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Supporting Conscious Parents in Being Peaceful, Real, and Loving
(even when your children are testing you the most...) |
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School Prep Tips |
August, 2013 | |
Hello ,
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What can I even say about school? It can be such a beautiful, fun, positive thing, and it can be really hard. Your own experience as a parent will colour your school choice, but also your perspective on what your child can hope for in his or her school experience.
I encourage you to choose your perspective on school intentionally. If you are worried that your child will | have a tough time, you'll probably be right. If, instead, you hold in your heart the possibility that your child will love school and find a nurturing community of supportive adults with a myriad of gifts to offer, and wonderful friendships will other children, it is much more likely that it will happen. This is the time to set aside your own fears, and connect with your vision and hopes for your child's experience.
1) Plan to be outdoors, close to home or school, doing not-much-at-all after school for the first two weeks. Your child will need lots of downtime to integrate the new experiences. If you've already booked activities, remember that nobody will die if you miss some. Prioritize your child's adjustment over everything else, clear your calendar as much as possible so that you can be around, and plan meals that you can prep ahead of time, or with minimal prep, so that you can be available for your child before school and at the end of the day.
2) If your child is at a new school, or in a new class, get to know the teachers, administration, parents and kids YOURSELF, as soon as possible. Get out of the car at drop off and pick up, go into the school often, hang around the school entrance, stay and play after school. Every child has an attachment umbrella, and YOU are its apex. Your child can connect most easily with people he or she knows that YOU know, like, and trust.
3) Get to know the teacher especially, and find out his or her strengths. A teacher who seems cold and distant to you may be incredibly gifted and deeply inspiring when she presents math concepts, and may earn the love of her students slowly but surely with fairness and love of her subject matter. Focus on strengths and the opportunities they bring, when you are talking with your child and with the teacher. Remember that teachers are people, imperfect and vulnerable. Give them every opportunity to shine, by appreciating them, supporting them, and understanding that they are learning, too. Help your child to develop this perspective, as well.
4) Help your child connect to other children for ease during class time and at recess. For preschool children and up, learn names and point out the children they've seen before. Plan playdates for 5-year-olds and up. If possible, get an extra carseat in your child's size so that you can take a friend along with you easily. Get to know the parents (see step 1), exchange phone numbers, and follow through. In traditionally structured classrooms, older children may go so far as to disrupt class because of their intense developmental need to get to know the other children - make it easy for them.
5) Walk or bike to and from school if at all possible. If not, park 10 minutes away and walk. This opportunity to connect with self, you, and Earth is a great way to slow the experience down and give everybody a little space to breathe.
6) Orient your child. Go this weekend and visit the playground, peek in the windows, find the door he will use, and talk about what it will be like. Let your child know, in as much detail as possible, what will happen in the morning, what the day will be like, and what will happen when you pick him up after school/he rides the bus/etc. Give detail. Encourage questions. Tell it again. For older children, review tips for making new friends, and basic playground etiquette.
7) Get buy-in by inviting your child to make a list, to shop, to choose, to prepare, and to carry his own things - to do whatever and as much as possible under his own steam. With a young child, ask your child to walk, holding your hand (rather than carrying him), ask him to lead you to the door, show you his hook for his coat, etc. Talk less, observe more, and step back so your child can step up. |
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You may just tingle with that crazy mixture of joy and pain as your child starts the new school year, or you may just be sighing in relief as you get back to your own familiar routine.
In any case, the seasons just don't stop. All this change and newness, and all this repetition and routine are just another reminder to get present, stay connected, and love from the bottom of your heart.
In joy,
Lisa Kathleen
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You Don't Have to
"Let Go"
School is another opportunity to deepen your connection with your child.
Your child needs a welcoming place to come home to, accepting arms to fall into, someone to listen and help understand the experiences he's having, and a wise parent who encourages
joy in life and a sense of adventure.
You
- exactly as you are -
are adequate and capable of the support your child needs to grow into his or her self and to connect with others.
You are needed now, more than ever.
Don't let go.
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Why Women's Wellness Circles?
It's time to carve out a time and a space for YOU.
I'd love to help.
Call me at
403-607-1463
to see if there's a way we can make a circle work in your life.
Love,
Lisa Kathleen | |
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